The Dark Truth about Denim Washes

No matter what your style preference for jeans, no matter how common they are, you should never buy distressed-wash jeans unless you are slender (and all of you is slender--not just your lower half).

A seemingly normal pair of jeans that could look fabulous on you in the right size and cut could look disastrous if the butt, front thighs or pelvic area are a lighter wash than the rest of the jeans. The light color draws attention to some of the worst problem areas a woman (or man, even) can have.

Think you've got thunder thighs without any pants on? Put on a pair of jeans with lighter washed thighs and you've got sausage legs. Got a big butt? The light wash will make it look even wider. Use common sense when buying jeans. Forget the trends--they're only around for a while before you look outdated and need to buy something new. Solid-colored or dark-washed jeans are the most flattering for all shapes, in any style.

Attack of the Icecream Cones

What seems to be one of the biggest fashion trends this fall? Skinny jeans.

How I rue the day some idiot designer thought of bringing them back in style. I was kind of hoping the 80's were dead forever.
Now there are hosts of Americans running around in unflattering denim tubes. There is something horrible to be said about what the skinny jean does for every shape:

1. Pear shaped: emphasizes the biggest part of your body
2. Big all over: emphasizes your size
3. Big on top: emphasizes how small your bottom half is
4. Big in the middle: emphasizes how small your bottom half is
5. Skinny legs: emphasizes how small your legs are--not a good look
6. Thin in general: does not create curves

Another good description? Ninety percent of American women who wear skinny jeans will look like an ice cream cone in them. I guarantee it. Tapered pants are anything but flattering. ("Mom pants" is another term that comes to mind.)



The moral of the story? Buy jeans that fit you. Screw all the stores whose inventory specialist ordered hoards of skinny jeans. They just think people are stupid enough to buy clothing just because it's in style. Don't prove them right!!!

(And on that note I must say the person who does inventory for the El Con Mall JCPenneys in Tucson deserves to be shot and killed.)


Help! This person has no ankles!

Carolina Herrera

The Fall 2006 Women's Ready to Wear line is out...but I was sadly disappointed by the number of pieces I fell in love with--which is very shocking to me.

Shopping on a budget

Some of their clothes are questionable; others are a definite pass. For supplements to your wardrobe, JCPenney's can provide some great items. Their misses section is full of gems (and some horrors, too), as is the womens work-attire section. The prices are moderate, many of the items are good quality and well-made. Stay away from the junior's department and underwear. The bra section, however, is excellent.

(above) W jacket ($34.99 to $39.99)

W striped gaucho ($29.99)

I must illustrate why I chose to put up a gaucho pant: this pair is structured, made of decent material (a cotton-polyester blend), and can be succesfully worn with things other than tee-shirts or tank tops.








a.n.a. print pintuck skirt ($21.99 to $24.99)











a.n.a. ribbed turtleneck sweater ($19.99 to $24.99)


Tea-length organza dress ($119.99)

Six Stellar Finds

This is a very simple shoe, but I wouldn't call it plain. The front buckle is chunky, which in itself is an accessory for the shoe. This is what I would call an "all-purpose" pair of shoes. They can be worn to work, to the grocery store, out with friends, on a date, to church, to a movie, to the mailbox. They would go great with jeans, slacks, a medium-length skirt (maybe even short, but not a mini), cropped pants or a simple wrap dress. They also come in red, black and medium-neutral (a shade of tan), but this brown seems to have the most posibilities...just be sure not to pair it with black! (Delilah by Bandolino, $72.95 at Zappos.com)



This shoe certainly is unique. It comes in this "bright-multi" and a "dark-multi" design. The color stripes are actually made of ribbon. I prefer the bright-multi because the white stripes give the shoe a dash of pizzaz. The point of the toe is not overstated with the seemingly-crazy design, and the heel is just high enough.This pair would go great with dark jeans and similar solids on top, layered or not. A very understated pattern on a similarly-colored, solid top would also work. (Grosgrain by Two Lips, $77.95 at Zappos.com)





This shoe is an accessorized take on the classic pump. It comes in three colors, but the one shown is a plum. Although there are various metal pieces on the shoe, it doesn't look gaudy. The buckle appears simple, even with the metallic detailing. The square studs on the heel are streamlined with the curve of the shoe, adding a simple line over the stitching and giving the row of round studs a parallel. I can see this with jeans or slacks, light or dark. A dark top, probably another shade of plum, brown or black, would work well over any color bottom with these shoes. (Brienna by Two Lips, $77.95 at Zappos.com)



This sassy little number still seems simple with rhinestones and multiple straps. The combination of the rhinestones and front bow makes it seem elegant, yet girly without looking like something designed for a four-year-old. The suede is cream-colored, which saves the shoe from the gaudiness it might acquire with rhinestones set in immaculate, shining silver fabric. These shoes would go well with dark jeans and a flirty top for a night out. They would also pair nicely with a solid-colored, medium-length skirt, probably in a dark color. Maybe not for the office, but for a nice outing. (Molly by Via Spiga, $282.95 at Zappos.com)



I had to think hard about this pair before putting it on my list. Normally I would cast away this style of shoe as "just plain gross", but this one got a second look out of me (and a third). The neutral color paired with the not-so-overdone cutout design makes this shoe, well, not as gaudy as one would think. The front bow is not overly-cute, as it might be without an open-toe style. This shoe would pair well with a medium-length skirt, slacks or jeans. I would stay away from wearing anything terribly dark close to this pair...I can certainly see it with tan slacks and a black tee, gold jewelry and a neutral (or even red!) purse. (Anya from O by Oscar de la Renta, $118.95 at Zappos.com)



If I had to describe this shoe in one word, I would use "flirtatious." Why? The bow on the front says "look at me!" and the thin ankle strap is sexy and cute at the same time. The luscious fushia color is eye-catching. The heel, with a two-tone twist, is dainty. I would love to put these shoes on with a pair of dark jeans or slacks. They could also go with a medium-length skirt in a darker color. Just be wary of piling on too much pink or purple with this shoe--the fushia can stand on it's own. Make sure this shoe is what really stands out in an outfit! (Naola by BCBG Max Azria, $253.95 at Zappos.com)

Save Yourself!

Why is it that so many people are attracted to sales, red dots and clearance racks?

After all, isn't the point of those things for the store to get rid of the crap people won't buy at full price?

And hasn't there got to be some reason people aren't buying it?

Sure, a good deal can be found on the clearance rack occasionally, but we shouldn't stick to clothing ourselves with mark-downs. The focus should instead be on finding quality pieces of clothing in classic styles, that will last a long time and can be paired with a variety of other items.

Take a black tank top, for instance. If the tank top is good quality (fabric and make) and well-taken care of (washed according to tag directions, inside out), it will last a long time without fading. That little black tank can be paired with a skirt and matching jacket for work--in any color, really, because black is the king of neutrals. It can be paired with jeans, heels and a sparkly shrug or cardigan for an evening outing. It will go with khaki or jean shorts and sandals on a hot day. Other shirts can be layered over it, with jeans or a skirt. And once it starts to get old (finally), it will make a great pyjama top. Just think of the possibilities!

The same goes for men: a nice, dark-solid tee can go with jeans and a button-up top, under a polo shirt and with jeans or slacks, alone with jeans or slacks, with shorts (alone or under a button-up), and so forth.

People today focus on quantity more than quality. We want lots of things in our closets so we feel like we have accomplished a lot. Too often people don't think about how poorly made some of those things are, whether or not they've just gone out of style with the season, whether they are flattering, or if the color is wrong. Some people even buy pieces (horror of horrors!) that don't fit them, just because they're on clearance. Others buy pieces that will never go with anything else, just because of a sale.

The moral of the story? Don't look at the pricetag. Look at the fit of the item. Think of the possibilities it has with other members of your wardrobe. Consider the materials that created it and how well the item was made. Will you actually wear that shirt, or are you just telling yourself because it's on sale for fifteen dollars?

Shop smart. Spend a little more to get better quality. Stay away from those red dots.